CHAPTER 3 — THE MAN WHO COULDN'T SLEEP
CHAPTER 3 — THE MAN WHO COULDN'T SLEEP
Seattle looked beautiful at night.
From the floor-to-ceiling windows of Caleb Morrison's penthouse, the city glittered beneath a blanket of rain, ferries crossing Elliott Bay like tiny stars drifting through darkness.
He had spent years believing this view represented success.
Tonight it looked empty.
The engagement ring Sarah had returned rested on the kitchen counter beside an untouched glass of whiskey.
He hadn't moved it.
Hadn't touched it.
Had barely breathed since leaving the gala.
Every time he closed his eyes, he saw only one face.
Lily.
The little girl with his eyes.
His smile.
His mannerisms.
His daughter.
His daughter.
The words echoed through the apartment like a sentence.
He walked into his study and opened a drawer he hadn't touched since the divorce.
Inside lay a faded photograph.
Harper stood beside him on the deck of their Lake Washington home, laughing as the wind tangled her auburn hair. They were younger then. Hopeful. They still believed love could survive anything.
He remembered that day vividly.
She had leaned against his shoulder and whispered, "Even if we never have children, I still choose you."
He had kissed her forehead.
"I'll always choose you too."
Caleb's hand trembled.
"I lied," he whispered to the empty room.
At three in the morning, he drove across the city.
Not to Harper's house.
He didn't know where she lived.
Instead, he stopped outside the fertility clinic they had visited for nearly three years.
The building was dark.
But memories flooded him anyway.
Harper smiling after every appointment even when the doctors delivered bad news.
Harper pretending injections didn't hurt.
Harper apologizing for something that had never been her fault.
"I'm sorry my body keeps failing us."
He had always answered the same way.
"We're a team."
Except they hadn't been.
The first time Sarah showed interest in him, he'd been exhausted.
Every conversation with Harper had become another discussion about treatments.
Another failed cycle.
Another loss.
Sarah had offered something easier.
Laughter.
Admiration.
Escape.
He told himself he deserved happiness.
He never admitted he had simply chosen the path that demanded less courage.
Now he understood the price.
The following morning, his executive assistant entered his office carrying the day's schedule.
"You have meetings with three investors, lunch with the mayor, and—"
"Cancel everything."
She blinked.
"Everything?"
"Everything."
She had worked for Caleb for eight years.
He had never canceled an entire day.
"Is everything okay?"
"No."
He stood.
"I need information."
"About what?"
"My ex-wife."
The assistant hesitated.
"Sir... after the divorce, you specifically instructed legal to remove her from all company records."
Another knife.
Another reminder.
He had erased Harper from his professional life as though eight years together had never happened.
"I know."
His voice sounded hollow.
"Undo whatever needs to be undone."
Meanwhile...
Across town...
Life was wonderfully ordinary.
Lily sat at the kitchen table wearing strawberry pajamas while carefully pouring too much maple syrup over her pancakes.
"Mommy?"
"Yes?"
"Was that man at the party sad?"
Harper paused.
Children noticed everything.
"He looked that way."
"Why?"
She smiled gently.
"Sometimes grown-ups make choices they wish they could change."
Lily considered that carefully.
"Like when I colored on the wall?"
Harper laughed.
"Something like that."
Lily nodded wisely.
"I said sorry."
"You did."
"And you hugged me."
"I did."
"So... maybe that man needs a hug."
Harper turned toward the window before Lily could see the tears gathering in her eyes.
If only life were that simple.
By noon, Caleb had hired a private investigator.
"I don't want anything illegal."
The investigator nodded.
"What exactly are we looking for?"
"My daughter."
Even saying the words felt unreal.
"I need to know where she lives."
The investigator folded his hands.
"I have to ask... does the child's mother know you're doing this?"
"No."
"You understand she'll find out eventually."
"I know."
"And if she believes you're trying to take the child—"
"I'm not."
Caleb answered so quickly even he surprised himself.
"I just..."
His voice broke.
"I just need to know she's real."
The investigator watched him carefully.
"You've never met her before yesterday?"
"No."
"Were you aware of the pregnancy?"
Caleb closed his eyes.
"No."
The investigator sighed quietly.
"I'll see what I can find."
That same afternoon...
Sarah Bennett packed her belongings from Caleb's penthouse.
She moved silently.
One suitcase.
Then another.
Every room reminded her of choices she wished she could erase.
She stopped in front of the nursery.
The room Caleb had recently begun designing.
Cream-colored walls.
A rocking chair.
Tiny stuffed animals.
She had once believed it represented their future.
Now it looked like a monument to stolen dreams.
Caleb walked into the doorway.
"I didn't hear you come in."
She didn't answer.
Instead, she picked up a tiny pair of knitted baby socks she'd bought only weeks earlier.
"I wanted this room to be filled with our children."
He stared at the floor.
"So did I."
She laughed bitterly.
"No."
She looked directly into his eyes.
"You wanted children after you believed Harper couldn't give you any."
Silence.
Painful.
Absolute.
"You replaced hope with convenience."
Every word landed perfectly.
"And I helped you."
Caleb finally spoke.
"I loved you."
Sarah nodded sadly.
"I know."
"Didn't you love me?"
She smiled through tears.
"I loved the version of you that I invented."
She glanced toward the window.
"But the real Caleb Morrison..."
She shook her head.
"...is a man who gave up one week before his miracle arrived."
Neither of them could argue.
Because it was true.
She zipped the final suitcase.
"I don't hate Harper."
"I know."
"I pity her."
Caleb frowned.
"Why?"
"Because she loved you enough to protect your child..."
Sarah picked up her purse.
"...from becoming another victim of your impatience."
She walked toward the front door.
Before leaving, she stopped one final time.
"If she never forgives you..."
She looked over her shoulder.
"...don't blame her."
The door closed quietly.
For the second time in two years...
Caleb found himself completely alone.
May you like
This time...
He knew he deserved it.
